Writing tips: Sentence clarity

Make your writing clear as a bell!

cogdogblog / Foter.com / CC BY-SA

In my work as your MALS Writing Consultant, I have come across a few writing errors that almost all writers seem to make at some point. I'd like to tackle those on the blog occasionally, and give you some tips about how to avoid them. Here, I bring you two errors that are major culprits in the muddling of otherwise good writing, and sure to get your papers marked "CLARIFY!"

• The dreaded "this"—The word "this" certainly has its place in the English language, but 

often its use leads to ambiguity in graduate level writing. Think about how you use "this" in speech. For example, at a restaurant you might say, "I'll have this sandwich," while pointing at a menu item so the waiter can see which sandwich you're talking about. If he can't see where you're pointing, "this" is a meaningless indicator. The same is true in writing. 

When you refer to an idea from a previous sentence with the word "this," you must tell your reader what "this" is. It's especially important to do so in graduate-level, interdisciplinary writing, because the concepts presented in the sentence to which "this" refers may be quite complex and encompass several ideas. 

If you write a sentence that says, "This is important because . . ." I may have no idea what is important. So, saying something as simple as "This area of interdisciplinary study is important because. . ." can help your reader say, "Oh yeah, she was just talking about a certain area of interdisciplinary study, and this sentence is going to tell me more about it." 

• Beware long, convoluted sentences—For interdisciplinary writers who are consulting multiple types of sources from multiple disciplines to come to new conclusions, it can be hard be brief. Sure, many of your sentences are going to be long and complex—complex sentences linking multiple concepts are a mark of advanced writing—but they must be coherent. 

Read sections of your paper aloud to help you identify overly complicated sentences (they'll usually sound that way when you hear them). Remember that it’s your job as a writer to distill the information from sources and your own conclusions into something your reader can understand. Sometimes you can fix really long sentences by simply breaking them into multiple sentences, but sometimes a long, confusing sentence is the result of really not understanding your source material. Check in with yourself to make sure you understand the concept, then try writing the simplest sentence possible ("Interdisciplinarity involves multiple disciplines."), and elaborate from there.

Your trusty writing consultant can help you identify these writing problems and give you more feedback on solving them—just contact me for a consultation!

Happy writing,

~Lahla

Hanging the Picture, Part II

I finished Hanging the Picture, Part I by stating that you, as an interdisciplinary writer, need to choose a topic narrow enough to analyze and discuss thoroughly without digging yourself into a disciplinary hole. In other words, it's important to balance focus with interdisciplinarity in your writing. If this sounds difficult, don't worry - even the most specific topic can benefit from an interdisciplinary approach. It just takes some strategic planning. Fortunately, there are two elements of the writing process that will help you out here: the working thesis and the research prospectus.


As stated in the accessible and handy MALS Writing Center, a working thesis "is a proposed answer to a focused research question" and "the main point of your argument that you develop throughout your paper." A working thesis is like the captain of your paper: you should refer to it frequently to make sure you're on the right track for your mission. It guides your decisions for choosing evidence from the appropriate disciplines and articulating your stance on an issue, which makes it helpful (if not vital) for developing an outline and identifying holes in your argument. A good working thesis not only answers the "So What ?" question but also provides you with direction and focus. 


The other essential tool for keeping you in an interdisciplinary frame of mind is the research prospectus. A prospectus is something like a business plan for your paper, and should include the following: 

• A brief description and introduction of your topic
• A paragraph or two stating what you already know about your topic
• Your primary research question; that is, what question are you answering with your....
• Working thesis - a tentative answer to your research question
• An outline of the evidence and types of evidence you plan to use to develop your thesis, including:
• A description of specific preselected sources containing the evidence including the disciplinary (or interdisciplinary) approach these sources represent
• A statement of other types of sources you plan to consult to develop your thesis
• A description of sources that present a dissenting or anomalous argument to your working thesis
• Acknowledgment of any known or foreseen counter-arguments or anomalies to your argument
• Justification of your proposed argument's significance (a.k.a. the "So What?" test)- explain why your working thesis is interesting and helpful to your scholarly community.

As you can see from this list, a prospectus forces you to think critically about your stance on a topic and the research necessary to provide a solid argument. It also sets your working thesis in action by linking your claim to some evidence. While your working thesis provides the focus for your paper, the prospectus helps you thoughtfully implement an interdisciplinary approach. After you've written a prospectus, you should have a pretty good idea about what you need to do to find evidence in the appropriate, strategically-chosen disciplines for your paper. 


If the thought of writing a paper about your paper - especially when you have three seminar papers, a job, a house to clean, etc. - makes you want to reach through the screen and give me a noogie, I can understand.  But TRUST me - forcing yourself to think about these things listed above early in the writing process will prevent you from wasting time and energy later! 


With a solid working thesis and a thoughtful research prospectus, you'll be well on your way to an insightful, interdisciplinary discussion of even the most complex topic. That's what makes MALS so fun - you get to examine (or reexamine) topics in a whole new way. The trick is to always remain aware of the direction you are taking in your writing and research. 

Hanging the Picture, Part I

Last time I wrote about finding ideas for interdisciplinary writing topics by seeking out in complex problems those questions that have the potential to spark a worthwhile discussion, or "finding the studs."

Let's go back to the literal wall for a second. Say you've found the studs and chosen the general area of the wall where you want to hang your picture. What now? Well, you need some more information, right?  You'll certainly want to consider the weight of the picture. If it's relatively light, you can use only one stud. If it's a particularly large or heavy picture, you may need to use two or more studs to hang your picture well. Underestimate the weight and your picture might fall off the wall. Overestimate and you've just poked unnecessary holes in the wall.

As writers, we need to remain conscious of the scope of a project when we choose a topic.  It's important  to make sure that your topic allows you to develop a working thesis that you can effectively argue in a single paper.  If you choose too broad a topic, your paper will lack direction and you'll be so busy trying to cover the issue that you end up writing a whole lot that actually argues very little. Narrow your topic too much for the assignment, and you'll struggle to find adequate evidence to flesh out an argument.

You are in MALS because you are interested in an issue that is enormously complex, hence the interdisciplinary approach. Chances are you don't have trouble keeping your topic broad enough, even if you're working on your project or thesis. More than likely, you repeatedly try to tackle too much in a single paper.

This is understandable. But don't let the complexity of a problem bully you into thinking that you have to address every layer of it in one paper. Instead, center your working thesis around one or two points that you can argue well. By offering some insight about one segment of a highly complex, systematic problem, you will benefit yourself and other scholars by providing a building block in the efforts to understand and address the issue as a whole.

So don't worry that you haven't hit every single point! You wouldn't expect to have the time, patience, or lack of sanity to take away the drywall, trace every single wire to its source, and analyze each square inch of a wall before hanging a picture, would you?

It's better to discuss a specific problem thoroughly than to discuss a generalized topic weakly.

Here's another way this can get tricky, though: you need to narrow your topic without digging yourself into a disciplinary hole. Hanging the Picture: Part II will offer tips for balancing focus with interdisciplinarity in your writing, with particular emphasis on developing a working thesis.

Oh, and Happy Valentines Day!

Kit

Finding the Studs

Imagine, if you will, that you have just moved into a trendy refurbished loft in downtown wherever. The location is amazing - it's above a hip Canadian Fusion restaurant and next to the world-renowned Interactive Theremin Museum. It has a gorgeous view of a crystal clear river. The building is over 100 years old and, according to the landlord, it was once a speakeasy. On one side of the apartment, there is a large blank wall. You have a framed portrait of your grandmother that you need hang on this wall. The wall has clearly been re-coated with drywall, even though it backs up to the theremin museum, and the restaurant's hood vents behind the drywall create a couple of column-like protrusions.

As you stare at the wall, you remember your landlord warned you to be careful, because the wiring in the building is a little finicky and he's surprised no one's blown up the whole place, and that if you damage anything in the apartment you'll lose your $4,000 deposit.

You have a bit of a problem here, don't you? You have this picture to hang (and you must hang it up because Grandma Gertrude is visiting soon and she made it clear that your inheritance depended on the portrait's being in a prominent location of your home) but you don't have a clue where to mount it to the wall. So many factors intertwine to make this giant wall a system of complex wires, all with another unique system depending on their proper functioning.  Some wires lead to a restaurant that needs them to power the stove and the flat screen TV at the bar, which they depend on to sell food and drink. Others lead to the Theremin museum, and still others lead to your baseboard heat (it's January).

You get the idea: this wall is actually the interface of an overwhelmingly complex system of physical, social, and even fiscal factors.  Still, despite the unknown arrangement of the wires, you need to hang this picture. You have a few options:

1. Assume the risk of nailing into the wall is too great and accept that your twerpy little brother will get your share of the inheritance
2. Ignore the complexity, thinking, "It's too complicated to even think about! As long as the picture's up who cares what's attached to them?" (an hour later, the Theremin museum shuts down and the restaurant tosses 200 pounds of spoiled salmon)
3. Find the studs - take the time to consider the impact of your picture-hanging and seek out those points on the wall that have the potential to hold the weight of Granny's portrait

You know the best option - find the studs. Look beyond the wall as a whole and find the places behind it that present the strongest point to focus your efforts. Then, with a better understanding of the system as a whole, make Granny happy and hang her portrait.

This scenario characterizes many complex topics that interdisciplinary scholars address in their research. The complex relationships among many social, historical, and environmental conditions shape an topic (for example, downtown revitalization efforts). Similarly, the complex relationships between the wires that power the building and the conditions of several external influences (granny and the landlord) shape the system of our wall. If we want to hang the picture safely, we need to consider the building in its entirety and then look for the best area to mount the frame to the wall. If we want to move toward a successful downtown revitalization, we need to consider the system as a whole and then address the underlying relationships using multiple disciplinary perspectives.

That said, most issues are so complex that it's impossible to attempt to address every contributing factor in one program of study, much less one paper. While it's important to realize the complexity of your topic, it's equally important to find the points within the system where there's an opportunity to expand knowledge about part of the system - knowledge that can later serve to strengthen understanding of the system as a whole.

As you move forward in your program of study, look at complex problems not as impenetrable walls, but as multilayered systems presenting many opportunities for further study. Even with the most complex problems, there are relationships among complicating factors where you can find a solid opportunity to build an argument.  By focusing on one or two elements of a complex problem and utilizing the multidisciplinary approaches best suited to each respective element, you can do two rather paradoxical things at once: effectively address a complex issue and generate a solid focus for your paper.

Find the studs, and start hanging that portrait.

Next time, I'll elaborate on ways to approach complexity as you begin the writing process. 

One Word for Interdisciplinary Writing in 2011

Forgive me for stating the obvious, but here we are about a week into 2011. Over the past week, I have spent some time thinking about how to kick off the new year, blogospherically speaking. Given the nature of my blog - writing issues for MALS students - it has been a bit of a challenge. The event of a new calendar year does not carry the same symbolic sense of renewal for a graduate student as it may for the average person; your milestones are set and met in terms of papers finished and semesters completed.

That said, I'm going to adopt a New Year's-based theme to begin 2011 and take the "one word" challenge. I am borrowing this idea from Katie Pozzuoli, author of Within Reach (who, in full disclosure, happens to be my cousin). She writes of her resolution to choose "one word" that will carry a special significance during the upcoming year; the idea being that this word will shape the way she approaches her actions and decisions over the next year, in every aspect of her life.

It's an interesting and refreshing alternative to a New Years resolution, and as I read Pozzouli's post, I thought to myself, "How might this "One Word" idea apply to interdisciplinary writers? What word might I suggest to MALS students that could adequately inform the mighty task of writing across several disciplines?" At first I dismissed the idea of applying the One-Word challenge to this blog. Interdisciplinary scholarship seemed far too complex to risk oversimplifying with a one-word characterization. Then it dawned on me.....

Complex.

What word better describes a MALS program of study and reminds us of why an interdisciplinary approach to our chosen areas of scholarship is necessary? Is it not the complexity of our chosen subjects, coupled with a recognition that a single disciplinary approach might not adequately produce useful knowledge about them, that prompted us to become interdisciplinary scholars in the first place?

Learning to accept complexity as a positive condition of interdisciplinary scholarship is key to getting the most out of your MALS experience. In fact, learning to actively seek out complexities in situations that on the surface seem straightforward can lead to some pretty exciting research topics! Recognizing complexity in your chosen area of study and meeting it as a friendly challenge rather than a frustrating roadblock to understanding will free you to concentrate on creating new knowledge about your interests.

I'd like to devote the next few blog entries to a mini-serious about the condition of complexity in interdisciplinary writing. As you enjoy the last few days of winter break, take a few minutes to think about complexity in your program of study. What historical events, cultural influences, or geographic conditions have contributed to your area of interest? How have they worked together to shape how your subject exists or operates today? As you consider these factors, try not to let the layers of complexity snowball and overwhelm you; rather, concentrate on why you decided to pursue your program of study in the first place. Chances are your interest is a result of the fascinating complexities that make your subject worth studying.

Throughout January and part of February, I'll be writing about ways to approach the inherent complexity in interdisciplinary scholarship in terms of writing, so check the blog frequently. Even better, follow my blog! I also encourage you to post comments with questions about complexity in interdisciplinary writing.

Enjoy the remainder of winter break, and Happy New Year!!!