Strong writing, in which passive voice will not be used (by zombies)

I have spent a completely unreasonable amount of time writing this post -- or, rather, trying to write it.

Even if you are not a shameless procrastinator like me, you've probably struggled with a similar problem at some juncture. I knew exactly what I wanted to talk about, but every time I tried to set the words down, they came out wrong: stiff and formal, and nothing like my usual writing style. This problem is not new to me; I regularly struggled with it while working on class papers and assignments. Many of us, when writing scholarly papers, tend to strive for a formality far removed from our ordinary style or voice. Unfortunately, that effort often leads instead to stilted, awkward, unclear writing. (As an ironic case-in-point, I spent a ridiculous amount of time writing, revising, and rewriting this paragraph because it sounded terribly artificial. It's still a little stiff for a blog, but it will have to do.)

Pie is delicious. Via zoomdoggle.

I set out to talk about passive voice -- a phrase which I will wager most of you have seen written in the margins of your papers at least once. When writing in past or present tense, passive constructions are rarely a good choice, because they approach the subject in an unnecessarily roundabout manner. We rarely use passive voice in everyday speech unless we lack complete information or are specifically trying to avoid clarity. You would never say "The entire pie was eaten by me." You might say "The entire pie was eaten," but only if you wish to avoid admitting that you ate the entire pie.

Similarly, you would not say "An 'A' was earned in that class." If you accomplish that feat, you'll take credit for it directly, by saying "I earned an 'A' in that class" rather than "An 'A' was earned by me in that class."

by Dan Savage, via savagechickens.com

These are, of course, oversimplified examples. Passive voice will often creep into papers in subtler forms. For example, one might claim "It has been said that pumpkin pie is delicious." That's all well and good, but who said it? If you know, say so; if you don't know, you will need to find out before you put it in your paper.

Passive construction with attribution isn't significantly better. It sounds pretty silly to write "It has been said by Emily that pumpkin pie is delicious." Why not simply, directly state that "Emily says that pumpkin pie is delicious"? It is. I said it. I'm not ashamed. You can quote me on it.

Passive voice isn't always so easy to spot, but culture and ethics professor Rebecca Johnson has a solution for that:

Discovered via the wonderful Grammarly page on Facebook

This is sheer brilliance. It works. Try it out:
"The results were published" vs. "He published the results" vs. "The results were interesting."
"The class was taken" vs. "The class was delicious."
"He used his brains" vs. "His brains were used."

Now, I'll grant that academic papers may be far more interesting once you throw a few zombies into the mix, but keep in mind that zombies are dangerous creatures. You're far better off closing any zombie-ready gaps you find. This is pretty easy to remember: zombies are pretty passive. Passive voice attracts zombies. Use your brains, stay active, and avoid the zombies.

Is passive voice always wrong? No; it does have its uses. Specifically, you may appropriately use passive voice when discussing future events or unknown information: "I suspect the entire pie will be eaten today," for example, or "We don't know when the pie was eaten." Additionally, passive voice is generally recommended for certain forms of science writing, where the writer wishes to convey objectivity. (See Grammar Girl's post on passive voice for more information.) When dealing with known information in past or present tense, however, it's rarely the best choice.*

If you write directly and assign credit where it's due, you shouldn't be troubled by passive voice. Zombies are a different matter. I'll just have to wish you luck there. Have a happy and safe Halloween, and I hope that none of you will be eaten.**

Cheers,
Emily

*Unless you are Yoda.*** In that case, however, you have some larger syntax issues to deal with first.
**By zombies.
***Pro tip: you are not Yoda.

A Comic Conference Adventure

I found this blog post already framed by Kit's words, and ready to share. I was very interested in Valerie's experience and asked her a number of additional questions about it. I will share her answers in a future post about conferences -- a relevant topic for me this semester, as I am currently gearing up to present a paper at the annual SAMLA Conference in Raleigh-Durham next month. For now, enjoy Valerie's account of her overseas academic adventure! ~Emily

If you read Valerie's earlier guest post, you know that she had the honor of presenting her work on comics and identity at the Graphic Novel Conference in Oxford, England, UK last month. Valerie has been kind enough to share a bit about the experience with MALS in a Minute! Her adventure, in many ways, is typical for a student presenter . . . in other ways (such as when it comes to opening doors), it was quite unusual . . .

Image source: IU Oxford page

Now that I’ve been on my first Big Conference Adventure, in OXFORD, ENGLAND!, first off let me say that no matter how inept you are at navigating the journey itself, I can relate. When the plane landed at Heathrow Airport in London, I got in line for customs before I realized that I should have used the facilities first. In addition to that discomfort, when a customs agent finally began to question me, I couldn’t confidently tell her where I came from or why I was travelling. She evidently decided that whatever plot I was planning was doomed to failure because she passed me on into England. At this point let me take a moment to thank the Heathrow architect for placing toilets immediately following customs.

When I reached Mansfield College in Oxford, it was too early to get into my room, so I decided to visit a nearby park. The park was beautiful and huge, with many gates and paths. I sat down to call my husband, as we had pre-arranged, to let him know that I was o.k. When I realized I couldn’t get my cell phone to work, I immediately freaked, set out in search of a pay phone, and got LOST. I changed my priority to getting back to Mansfield College, and, after asking various people, I eventually found someone who could direct me.

It was still too early to get into my room, but I didn’t know what time it was because I had incorrectly used the daylight savings time function on my travel clock. The porter took pity on me, sold me a phone card, and gave me my room key early. He then proceeded to explain how the locks work. On the door to the building one uses an electronic button, waits for a green light and then pushes the door open. For the room door one uses the same electronic button, waits for the ringing buzz sound, and then turns the locking mechanism two times to the right to open, and twice to the left to close. I confess, instead of politely asking him to repeat those instructions, I replied: “Oh no!” The porter then escorted me into the building and up to the room and taught me how to open the doors. . . . Let’s review:

        

Tiger By the Tail by Valerie Bodell

I didn’t know where I was
I didn’t know what time it was
I couldn’t use my cell phone and
I couldn’t open the door.
Everyone I had had direct contact with has the 
       impression that I am helpless and shouldn’t 
       travel alone.


Everything after getting into the room was easy: I called my husband only a half hour late, and my presentation went well, though I got more complements on my presentation style than on the content. . . it’s good to know your strengths.


Let me share my feelings as an attendee. We listen more than we present, so for those who are listening to you, please start your presentation from the beginning, don’t assume that all of us know what you’re talking about. Also, please practice going slowly, especially if the language of the conference is not everyone’s first language. My approach to presenting, in case it will help anyone, follows: I didn’t use any technology mostly because I did not want to be that responsible, figure out the connections, or carry the weight of a laptop. I only had two images and I printed them out on both sides of one piece of paper to hand out to attendees. An added advantage of a paper copy was that everyone got the same view of my material no matter where they were sitting. I wore relaxed professional clothes that I did not have to think about, and I practiced . . . A LOT, so I could be comfortable with my material and just talk to the audience. The question and answer portion is not scary for me because by then I have successfully completed my presentation. In addition, this time I did not get many questions. I especially appreciated learning firsthand the depth and breadth of work currently going on in my field of interest. My final piece of advice is to try to take comfort from the other beginners, and learn from the more experienced. 
~Valerie Bodell

If you are scheduled to present at a conference soon, take Valerie's advice! Practice! If you haven't given a conference a second thought, why not? As Valerie mentions, conferences are an excellent way to meet people with similar academic and worldly interests, and you will learn more about how your topic fits into the bigger picture. Thanks, Valerie!

    

Red Cabbage by Valerie Bodell

First things first

Greetings, MALS friends, from your shiny new Writing Consultant! My name is Emily Carmichael. A few of you already know me from classes we shared during the past two years; I hope to meet the rest of you face to face sometime soon.

I graduated from MALS in May 2012. My area of study was the relationship between text and culture, with specific emphasis on folklore and fairy tales. Because text and culture are both broad fields, I built my program of study from a relatively wide variety of disciplines, including literature, art, history, and anthropology. For my Capstone, I chose to do a creative project focused on Grimms' fairy tales and the ongoing process of revising and retelling those stories, both visually and verbally, with an emphasis on the mutual interplay between retellings and the cultures in which they are produced. 

Grimms' Girls: part of a larger series
which made up part of my Capstone.
Acrylic and glitter on canvas, 2012.

My undergraduate work is in fine art and literature. I also have a background in librarianship (I have worked in public and school libraries, and earned my Master of Education with a concentration in school library media simultaneously with my MALS degree), which means I'm happy to help with research problems. I will certainly post about research here as well.

I came to MALS, interdisciplinarity, and writing quite naturally; I am addicted to learning, my scholarly background is varied, and I have always had a tendency to think and write interdisciplinarily (although I didn't know there was a name for it). Even so, I found the work I did in the MALS program to be the most challenging of my life, in no small part because MALS students are held to an extremely high standard. As intimidating as that standard is, and as frustrating as I found it at times, it has shaped me into a far better writer than I was prior to entering the program. 

Swan Song. Acrylic and oil on canvas, 2012.

Additionally, I struggled with many assignments because I am highly subject to the major pitfalls that trip up many students: procrastination, a short attention span, and a vocal inner critic. While I still don't know how to fully conquer these problems, I have learned to devise personal strategies to circumvent them, a little at a time, in order to get the necessary work done. At a later date I'll talk some about those strategies as well.

On a personal note, I live here in Johnson City, so I am happy to make face-to-face appointments if those suit your working style better than online conversations. At present I live with four cats, but only two are permanent (the other two are foster kittens), so I have not quite reached cat lady status yet. I spend much of my free time reading, cooking, and performing in local theatre productions.

Since it is now my responsibility to craft a blog worth the time it will take for you to read, I will do my best to keep things fun as well as informative. I'll also try to do the same with the MALS Writing Center Facebook page. I look forward to meeting, getting to know, and working with all of you. 

Cheers,

Emily

p.s. Despite my background in literature, I still find theory challenging! If it's easy for you, please let me know, because I want to shake your hand.

Passing the Torch

Good Evening MALS students,

Most of you know by now that starting tomorrow, Thursday, October 11, you will have a new MALS Online Writing Consultant.

During the past two years, my goal has been not only to support my fellow MALS colleagues through the often murky and treacherous writing process, but also to become a reliable, trusted source of sanity. If there's anything I recall from my own time as a student, it's that we can all use some calming perspective from time to time, and I have always tried to maintain that voice of perspective without sliding into a pit of preachiness. Much to my delight, I have received some very kind words from many of you that indicate that I succeeded to some degree.

I now want to take this opportunity to tell you how much you have helped me become a better writer and life-long interdisciplinarian.

Because of you, I have had the best job in the whole MALS world. I have been in the unique and privileged position to learn through your scholarship - and as a result I know more about art, women's and gender issues, music, and genealogy than I ever could have foreseen. I have seen students go from human balls of stress to poised, articulate writers and public speakers. I have seen students become ambassadors of MALS at a variety of conferences and scholarship programs throughout the world. To be associated with you as MALS alumna is an honor.

It is time for me to move on, but neither I nor the MALS program are leaving you hanging. Emily Carmichael, a 2012 MALS graduate and a splendid writer, will carry on my mission. In fact, she'll probably offer even better feedback, not the least because she'll be able to provide a fresh perspective to the writing process. I bet she won't use cats or bikes in so many of her examples, either. I know Emily is looking forward to working with you, and you will be in interdisciplinarily good hands.

Alas, it is now time to say farewell. I wish you all the absolute best as you continue graduate school, celebrate earning your degree, and use your knowledge and abilities to contribute to your job, family, and community.

Thank you, and good night!

Kit Hayes
MALS Class of 2010